CHAPTER V

OF THE FOURTH COMMANDMENT

HONOUR THY FATHER AND THY MOTHER, THAT THY DAYS MAY BE LONG UPON THE LAND, WHICH THE LORD THY GOD GIVETH THEE

QUESTION I

Dignity of this Precept and its Accordance with the Preceding Commandments

As in the foregoing commandments there is supreme force and dignity, so those of which we now treat, because extremely necessary, deservedly hold the next place. For the former have immediate reference to God, who is our end, while these latter instruct us in charity towards our neighbour; although remotely, they also conduct us to God, that ultimate end, for whose sake we love our neighbour. Hence Christ our Lord has said, that these two commandments, touching the love of God and of our neighbour, are like unto each other. The advantages arising from the consideration of this subject, can scarcely be expressed in words, bringing with it as it does not only its own fruits, and those in richest abundance and excellence, but also presenting a sign of our obedience to, and observance of, the first commandment: He, says St. John, that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God, whom he hath not seen? In like manner, if we do not honour and reverence our parents, whom we ought to love next to God, and whom we have almost continually before our eyes, how can we honour or reverence God, the supreme and best of parents, whom we cannot see? Hence the accordance of both commandments is obvious.

QUESTION II

Extent of the Application of this Precept, and its Beneficial Influence in regard to Parents

The application of this commandment is of very great latitude, for, besides those who begat us, there are many others whom, on account of their power, dignity, usefulness, exalted functions, or office, we ought to revere with parental honour. It also lightens the labours of parents and superiors, for as the principal duty that devolves upon them is, that those under their authority lead correct lives, suited to the divine law, this will be a very easy task, if all understand that, by the authority and injunction of God, the highest honour is to be given to parents. To effect this, it is necessary to know the difference that exists between the precepts of the first and second table.

QUESTION III

Wherefore the Distinction is made of the Precepts of the Law into Two Tables

This, therefore, the pastor must first explain, and he must begin by observing, that the divine precepts of the decalogue were inscribed on two tables, on one of which, as we learn from the holy Fathers, were contained the three which we have already explained, on the other the remaining seven. For us this description is most apposite, that the nature of the commandments might be distinguished by their very order; for whatever is commanded or prohibited in sacred Scripture by the divine law, springs from one of two principles, the love of God or of our neighbour; and our charity must be actuated by one or other of these. Now the three preceding commandments teach us the love which we owe to God; in the other seven are contained the duties which we owe to domestic and public society. The distinction, therefore, which refers some to the first, others to the second, table, is not without good reason.

QUESTION IV

In what manner our Love towards God is contained in the First Three Precepts and our Duty towards our Neighbour in the remaining Seven, and of the Difference between both

For, in the preceding three commandments, of which we have spoken, God, the supreme good, is as it were the subject matter; in the others, the good of our neighbour: the first propose supreme, the others, secondary love; the first regard the ultimate end, the others, the things that refer to that end. Again, the love of God terminates in God himself, for God is to be loved above all things solely for his own sake; but the love of our neighbour originates in, and is to be referred, as it were, to a rule, to [the love of God]. For if we love our parents, obey our masters, respect our superiors in dignity, our ruling principle in doing so should be, that God is their original, and wishes those to have the pre-eminence, by whose co-operation he governs and protects all others; and as he expects that we yield respect to such persons, we should do so, because by him they have been exalted to a station worthy of this honour. Hence if we honour our parents, the tribute would seem paid to God rather than to man; and accordingly we read in St. Matthew, with regard to duty to superiors: He that receiveth you, receiveth me; and the apostle in his epistle to the Ephesians, giving instruction to servants, says: Servants, obey them that are your masters according to the flesh with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto Christ: not with eye service, as men pleasers, but as the servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart.

QUESTION V

In what manner the Love of God is Boundless, but the Love of our Neighbour is comprised within Due Bounds

Moreover, no honour, no piety, no worship can be rendered to God, sufficiently worthy of him, towards whom love admits of infinite increase; and hence our love should become every day more fervent towards him, whom, according to his own command, we are to love with our whole heart, our whole soul, and with all our strength; but the love with which we embrace our neighbour is included by its own proper limits, for we are commanded to love our neighbour as ourselves; and if we outstep these limits, so as to love him as we love God, we are guilty of a most grievous crime: If any man come unto me, saith our Lord, and hateth not his father and mother, and wife and children, and brethren and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple. To him who would first have attended the burial of his father, and then follow Christ, it was said, to the same effect: Let the dead bury their dead; and the same lesson is more clearly conveyed in these words in St. Matthew: He that loveth father or mother, more than me, is not worthy of me.

QUESTION VI

In what manner Parents are to be loved, and why Obedience is sometimes to be refused them

Parents, no doubt, are to be earnestly loved and respected; but religion especially requires that the principal honour and homage be given to God, who is the creator, and father of all; and that, therefore, the whole force of our love for our mortal parents be altogether referred to our immortal Father who is in heaven. But should the injunctions of parents be at any time repugnant to the commands of God, children without doubt are to prefer the will of God to the wish of their parents, always keeping in view the divine maxim: We ought to obey God rather than men.

QUESTION VII

Meaning of to “Honour”

Having premised thus much, the pastor will explain the words of the commandment, beginning with honour. To honour, is to think honourably of any one, and to hold in the highest estimation everything that regards him. And this honour includes love, respect, obedience, and veneration; and it is here judiciously employed, in preference to the word, love, or fear, although parents are also to be very much loved and feared; for he who loves does not always feel respect and veneration; neither does he who fears invariably love; but he who honours from the heart, combines both fear and love. The pastor will next explain who they are, whom this command designates as fathers.

QUESTION VIII

Who are designated as Fathers

For, although the law refers principally to our natural fathers, the name extends likewise to others, whom the law also appears to embrace, as we easily infer from numerous passages of holy Scripture. Besides the fathers who have begotten us, there are then, as we already noticed, other sorts of fathers also in the sacred Scriptures, each of whom is entitled to his own particular honour; and first the prelates of the Church, her pastors, and priests, are called fathers, as is evident from the apostle writing to the Corinthians: I write not these things, says he, to shame you, but as my beloved sons I warn you, for though ye have ten thousand instructors in Christ, yet have ye not many fathers; for in Christ Jesus I have begotten you through the gospel. We also read in Ecclesiasticus: Let us praise famous men, and oar fathers that begat us. Those who govern the state, to whom are intrusted empire, magistracy, or power, are also called fathers: thus Naaman was called father by his servants. To those, to whose care, fidelity, probity, and wisdom, others are committed, such as guardians and curators, instructors and masters, the name of fathers is also given; and hence the sons of the prophets called Eliyah and Elisha by this name. Finally, aged men, worn out with years, who are also entitled to our respect, we call fathers. In the instructions of the pastor, he will most especially enforce the obligation of honouring all without exception who are entitled to he denominated fathers, but especially our natural fathers, of whom the divine command principally speaks.

QUESTION IX

Why Sons ought to pay Especial Honour to their Parents according to the Flesh

For these are, as it were, so many images of the immortal God; and in them we behold the likeness of our origin: from them life has been given us: them God made use of, that he might infuse into us a soul and reason; by them we have been conducted unto the sacraments, formed unto religion, human intercourse, civil society, and instructed in moral integrity and holiness. The pastor will also teach that with good reason is the name of mother mentioned in this precept, that we may consider the benefits received from her, and her claims upon our affection, with what care and solicitude she bore us in her womb, with what pain and travail she brought us forth and trained us up.

QUESTION X

Nature of the Honour due to Carnal Parents

Moreover, parents are so to be loved, that the honour which we pay to them may appear to be the spontaneous offering of sincere and inward love. To this tribute they are pre-eminently entitled, since, for love of us, they are disposed to shun no labour, no exertion, no danger; whose highest pleasure it is to know, that they are endeared to their children, who are the objects of their fondest love. Joseph, when, next to the king, he enjoyed in Egypt the highest honour, and the amplest power, received his father with honour, when he went down into Egypt; and Solomon rose to receive his mother as she approached, and having paid her the tribute of veneration, placed her on a royal throne at his right hand. There are also other duties of respect due to our parents, such as to supplicate God in their behalf, that they throughout may lead prosperous and happy lives, most beloved and esteemed among men, and most pleasing to God and to his saints who are in heaven. We also honour our parents, by submitting our views to their judgment and inclination: My son, says Solomon, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother; for they shall be an ornament of grace unto thy head, and chains about thy neck: Children, says St. Paul, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right; and also: Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. This doctrine is also confirmed by the example of men most eminent for holiness: for Isaac, when bound for sacrifice by his father, meekly and implicitly obeyed; and the Rechabites, in order never to depart from the counsel of their father, always abstained from wine. We also honour our parents by the imitation of their good example and conduct; for to propose to ourselves others as models for imitation, is the highest mark of esteem. We also honour our parents, when we not only ask but also follow their counsels.

QUESTION XI

In what manner we ought to aid our Parents when in Want, and especially when in Danger of Death

Also when we relieve their wants, supplying them with the necessary food and raiment, according to these words of the Redeemer: Why do ye also transgress the commandment of God by your tradition? For God commanded, saying: Honour thy father and mother; and he that curseth father or mother, let him die the death; but ye say: Whosoever shall say to his father or his mother, it is a gift by whatsoever thou mightest be profiled by me; and he honour not his father or his mother, he shall be free; thus have ye made the commandment of God of none effect by your tradition.

If, then, it is our duty always to award honour to our parents, this duty is still more imperative, when they are dangerously ill; for we should then take especial care, that they omit nothing that regards either the confession of their sins, or the other sacraments that should be received by Christian men at the approach of death; and we should take care that they be frequently visited by pious and religious persons, who may strengthen them in their weakness, aid them by their counsel, and animate them to a lively hope of a glorious immortality; that, having elevated their mind above the concerns of this world, they may fix their thoughts entirely on God. Thus it will come to pass, that, blessed with the most sublime virtues of faith, hope, and charity, and fortified by the sacraments of the Church, they will not only look without dismay at death, which is the necessary lot [of all men], but will hail it as the opening to immortality.

QUESTION XII

How we ought to honour our Dead Parents

Finally, we honour our parents even after their death, by attending to their funerals, procuring for them honourable obsequies, giving them a respectable interment, taking care that suffrages and sacrifices be offered for them, and by punctually executing their last wills.

QUESTION XIII

How Bishops and Priests are entitled to the Name of Father

But we are bound to honour not only our natural parents, but also those who are called fathers, such as bishops and priests, kings, princes and magistrates, guardians, masters, teachers, aged persons and the like; for they are entitled, some in a greater, some in a lesser degree, to share our love, our obedience, our assistance. Of bishops and other pastors it is written: Let the elders that rule well he counted worthy of double honour, especially they who labour in the word and doctrine. And what proofs of earnest love for the apostle must not the Galatians have given, to whose benevolence he bears this glorious testimony: I bear you record, that if it had been possible, you would have plucked out your own eyes, and have given them to me.

QUESTION XIV

In what manner Priests ought to be supplied with the Necessaries of Life

The priests are also entitled to receive whatever is necessary for their support: Who, says the apostle, goeth a warfare at any time at his own charges? and in Ecclesiasticus it is written: Give honour to the priests, and purify thyself with thine arms; give them their portion, as it is commanded thee, of the first fruits and of purification. The apostle also teacheth that they are entitled to obedience: Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves; for they watch as they that must give account for your souls. Nay, more, Christ himself commands us to obey even wicked pastors, when he saith: The Scribes and the Pharisees sit in Moses’s seat; all, therefore, whatsoever they bid you observe, that observe and do; but according do ye not after their works, for they say and do not.

QUESTION XV

Public Functionaries are to be honoured

The same is to be said concerning our conduct towards kings, princes, magistrates, and all others to whose authority we are subject; the honour, respect, and obedience due to whom are explained at large by the apostle to the Romans. He also admonishes us to pray for them; and St. Peter saith: Submit yourselves to every human creature for God’s sake: whether it be to the king as supreme, or unto governors, as unto them that are sent by him. For if we honour them, that honour is referred to God, for the grade of exalted dignity, because an image of the divine power, commands man’s veneration; and in it we also revere the providence of God, who has committed to them the administration of the public office which they hold, and who uses them as the ministers of his power.

QUESTION XVI

Why we ought to obey even Wicked Magistrates, and when not

Not that we respect the profligacy or wickedness of men, should public functionaries be of such a character, but that we revere the divine authority with which they are invested; so that—and it may appear matter of great marvel—even though they be inimical and hostile, nay, implacable, towards us, yet is that not a sufficient reason to exempt us from evincing great respect towards them. Thus David rendered important services to Saul, when he was the object of his hatred, as he intimates in these words: With them that hated peace, I was peaceable. But should they issue a wicked or unjust mandate, they are on no account to be obeyed; for [such mandate] is not the legitimate exercise of power, but is an act of injustice and perversity. Having expounded these matters severally, the pastor will next consider the nature of the reward promised to the observance of this divine commandment, and the suitableness thereof.

QUESTION XVII

Reward promised to the Observance of Obedience to Parents

Its fruit consists principally in length of life; for they who always preserve the grateful recollection of a benefit, deserve to be blessed with its lengthened enjoyment; and this children do who honour their parents; for to those from whom they received life, they gratefully acknowledge the obligation, and are therefore deservedly rewarded with the protraction of that life to an advanced age. The nature of the divine promise next demands distinct explanation, for it includes not only the eternal life of the blessed, but also the term of our mortal existence on earth, according to these words of the apostle: Godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come.

QUESTION XVIII

How valuable is the Promise of a Long Life

Many very holy men, it is true, as Job, David, Paul, desired to die, and a long life is disagreeable to the afflicted and the wretched; but the reward here promised is, nevertheless, neither inconsiderable, nor to be despised; for the additional words, which the Lord thy God will give thee, promise not only length of days, but also repose, tranquillity, security to live well; for in Deuteronomy it is not only said, that thy days may he prolonged, but it is also added, and that it may go well with thee, words which the apostle afterwards repeats.

QUESTION XIX

In what manner this Reward is received by Dutiful Children, even when they die early

These blessings, we say, are conferred on those whose piety God would thus reward. For otherwise the divine promise would not be realized, whereas more dutiful children are sometimes the more short-lived; and this either because their interests are best consulted by summoning them from this world before they stray from the sacred path of virtue and of duty, for they are taken away, lest that wickedness should alter their understanding, or deceit beguile their soul; or because, when destruction and confusion of all things impend, they are called away from this world to escape the common calamity of the times: The just man, saith the prophet, is taken away from the evil to come. This occurs lest, when God avenges the crimes of mortals, their virtue or salvation may be endangered, or to spare them the most bitter anguish of witnessing, in most melancholy times, the calamities of friends and relations. The premature death of good men, therefore, gives greater reason for apprehension.

QUESTION XX

Punishment of the Violators of this Precept

But if Almighty God holds out rewards and advantages to remunerate those who are grateful towards their parents, the heaviest chastisements are also reserved to punish filial ingratitude and impiety; for it is written: He that curseth his father or his mother shall surely be put to death; and: He that afflicteth his father, and chaseth away his mother, is a son that causeth shame, and bringeth reproach; and: Whoso curseth his father or his mother, his lamp shall be put out in obscure darkness; and: The eye that mocketh at his father, and despiseth to obey his mother, the ravens of the valley shall pick it out, and the young eagles shall eat it. We have on record many instances of undutiful children, in punishing of whom the anger of God burnt forth. The disobedience of Absolom to David did not escape chastisement, for in punishment of his crime he died transfixed with three spears. But of those who obey not the priests, it is written: The man that will do presumptuously, and will not hearken unto the priest that standeth to minister there before the Lord thy God, by the decree of the judge even that man shall die.

QUESTION XXI

Duties of Parents towards their Children, by which they may best render themselves worthy the Honour prescribed by the Divine Law

As, then, by the divine law, children are commanded to honour their parents, to obey, to respect them, so are there reciprocal duties and offices which parents owe to their children, to imbue them with most holy discipline and morality, and to give them the best precepts for the regulation of their lives, that, taught and trained unto religion, they may serve God holily and inviolably. Such, we read, was the conduct of the parents of Susannah. Let, then, the priest admonish parents to be to their children instructors in virtue, in justice, continence, modesty, and holiness; and let them guard particularly against three things, in which they are often wont to transgress. In the first place, let them not say or do anything too harsh towards their children: this is the instruction of the apostle in his epistle to the Colossians: Fathers, says he, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged; for there is danger of breaking the spirit of children, and rendering them of abject mind, afraid of everything. Let [the pastor,] therefore, enjoin parents to avoid too much severity, and rather reprove their children than avenge themselves upon them.

QUESTION XXII

But Parents should not be remiss towards their Children, nor should they toil to leave them an Excessive Patrimony

Should a fault be committed which requires reproof and chastisement, the parents should not, on the other hand, by unseasonable indulgence, overlook its correction, for children have often become depraved by the too great lenity and pliancy of their parents. The pastor, therefore, will deter from such criminal weakness by the warning example of the high-priest Heli, who, in consequence of his too great indulgence towards his children, was visited with the heaviest chastisement. Finally, to avoid what is most shameful in the instruction and education of their children, let them not enter into preposterous designs; for there are very many whose sole thought and concern it is to leave their children wealth, riches, an ample and splendid patrimony; who encourage them not to piety and religion, or to the pursuit of honourable and virtuous things, but to avarice and to the increase of patrimony; and who, provided their children be rich and wealthy, are regardless of those qualities which would ensure their reputation and salvation. Language cannot express, nor can thought conceive, anything more shameful [than the conduct of such parents]. Thus it comes to pass that they transfer to them not so much their worldly wealth, as their wickedness and crimes, leading them finally not to heaven, but to the everlasting torments of hell. Let, then, the priest impress on parents the soundest principles, and excite them to imitate the virtuous example of Tobit, that, having well brought up their children to the service of God, and to holiness, they may, in turn, experience at their hands the most abundant fruit of affection, respect, and obedience.